July 18, 2012
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Growing Balls.
Balls in ALL the courts!
Is this it? The end of masculinity as we know it? Or are women equally at fault in the game of dating?
It's the 21st century and gender roles don't exist anymore. For the most part, women can play the role of men. I'm all for women's rights, believe me. But somewhere along the way from evolving stay-at-home moms to today's female CEOs, one thing hasn't changed: men growing balls.
The old adage of how "a man should make the first move" is, in my opinion, feudal at best. Much like how guys are pushing back against paying for dinners--the argument that this isn't the 1940s, you women have jobs now--women feel us men need to initiate the approach at the bar, at the supermarket, or your friend's wedding.
This needs to stop.
When spotting that attractive dame across the room.
How men think a girl will react upon approaching her.What is it about having ingrained in the minds of men that they should make the first move? Is it a measure of confidence? How do women define that? It's what every woman lists in their online dating profile.
I wouldn't want to be around a woman who wanted me making all the decisions or who felt inferior to me. That would be pretty creepy (insert new meme "Unassertive Girlfriend"). I would much rather have a woman who could stand up and be my equal than a woman who thinks I should be "in charge."
What usually happens when most men ask a girl out.Perhaps this is a signal of change. Or my way of speaking on behalf of the men out there who prefer the girl making eye contact across the bar to make the first move. If neither of you act on it, who knows what you'll miss out on.
Men: Have you been approached by a woman before? How did it turn out?Ladies: Have you approached a man before? Do you feel men should approach you instead of the other way around?
Comments (18)
ALL THE SINGLE LADIES IN THE HOUSE PUT YOUR HANDS UP!
PUT YOUR HANDS UP!
PUT YOUR HANDS UP!
Nope. Never been approached by a woman. Then again, I never really approached any women in public either.
/puts hand up
There's nothing like the thrill of making the first move after making eye contact with a guy. Sure drinking makes it easier, but acting upon impulses while sober feels so much better.
I think it's funny you associate girls who do not approach guys as later they will lets the guys wear the pants. I thought some girls did not approach guys because they feel too good and do not want to succumb to it and later they have no problems wearing the pants. LOL.
Women who will NEVER approach a guy are likely missing out on getting to know a guy. It really doesn't take much, you don't have to walk up to them and give a pick-up line, but for some guys they want some sort of hint that you are willing to them speaking to you, a nice smile, some eye contact, something little will usually suffice.
Not all women just wait around for dates; if I'm interested in a guy, I approach them first. We're in the 21st century, after all.
I'm sure there are guys that prefer to make the first move all the time, but so far I haven't had a guy tell me they would mind it if a girl made the first move. So many missed opportunities out there for people that still think that if they like a guy, the best thing to do about it is to wait for them to approach.
I've never asked a guy out personally. I just give them strong hints like, "hey, we should bang." Then I wait for them to ask me out IN TRUE LADY FASHION.
I've definitely asked a lot of guys this and while most say that it would be nice to have a girl explicitly express interest and not make him jump through hoops to do the same for her, a good handful also say that they feel a bit uncomfortable with girls who are that assertive/aggressive and like making the first move. I guess if they know they're going to make that move, they don't like having their thunder stolen?
I've thought about making the first move a bunch of times, but I get really scared of putting myself out there like that. I'll set it up the best I can for the guy to make the first move though! XD
IS THIS ENTRY GEARED TOWARD ME?! haha
unassertive girlfriend hides in corner
i do hate when the S.O. makes no decisions that gets so annoying
i've never made the first "move" maybe eye contact and some talking but meh
@Sheegwa - *slides on over* how YOU doin'?
I've approached men and vise versa. I think most men were just bewildered of a girl doing it instead of them, but hey, in my mind... he's cute, why the hell not? am I right?
If I want something, I take it. idgaf!
Lol, I'm old-fashioned when it comes to this... I don't think I'll ever approach the guy. I don't chase boys. Haha.
Well, when I was in the "single-world" I was pretty straightforward if I was interested. But, unless I was super drunk or otherwise impaired, I would only drop hints and flirt...it was up to the guy to make the move if he was interested. Maybe it was the fear of rejection, idk. I had a 50/50 rule. If I like a guy I will put in the effort to make it plain that I am interested, then assuming he is interested, he will reciprocate and then initiate the first move. I was never opposed, though, to it being the opposite way, if a guy shows enough interest in me to make me sure that he is interested, I would make the first move...maybe? Lol.
It just feels more right to have the dude do it. IDK why, in some ways this "21st century woman" goes a little extreme. I wouldn't want all the resposibilities of a man, or to be seen as a controlling woman who don't need no man. It's nice when men come to you and make a move, it's nice to feel secure once in awhile and let the man have some control. Or take care of his woman.
I think that's what's wrong with a lot of relationships these days. Although a lot of things that have changed are good, but some things should remain as they were.
Have to say, I hate being rejected just as much as the next guy. But as a woman, it's not much easier - for me anyway. Im easily intimidated by good looks. I'll eye rape a guy before actually saying anything. If I see he's interested then maybe I'll say something or wave. Since I'm more traditional, I'll usually wait for the guy to make the first verbal move. And then pray he speaks english [not ebonics] lol...
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