Interests:The internet, movie-making, digital photography, graphic design, getting the last word, masticating, music, the arts, and various sports involving balls that bounce. Expertise:Dry wit & black humor Occupation:Full-time slacker
Behold! The state of New Jersey awaited us (once more) on our cake day. A day filled with food, drinks, and merriment. It was neigh one, but two celebrations to be held. Enjoy ye photographs below!
Jersey welcomed us with their castle.
Arriving with 10 minutes to spare.
The king is here!
The food to be served.
The gallant knights prepare the scene.
Knights fighting.
Courses of food being consumed.
Jousting your mothers.
And fog machines everywhere.
The group photo. Can you spot the non-minority?
NYC Beatles.
Fresh cookies and ice cream. The vendor loved us so much he gave us a discount.
A random bike race. Only in New York.
Starting the afternoon off with a bunch of beers.
Cheers!
This awesome group of people bought me and our table a few rounds after finding out it was our birthdays. A chugging for the ages. USA! USA! USA!
One of many rounds.
Drinking games with cellphones.
Dinner in Chinatown with some friends. @mkazama picture here.
If there's one rule in the Manly Brocode of Codiness™ that every guy should follow, it's to never cockblock. Even if you're Dwyane Wade, you don't cockblock me.
This past weekend was spent celebrating a friend's birthday along with mine. It was a marathon of day drinking and eating, starting around noon. The night approached as we found ourselves in a nightclub. We made our way downstairs where these two female promoters came up to me and asked if I wanted free drinks. Who'd ever decline a free drink from strangers? Plus, I love the taste of roofies, especially from the ladies. So I agreed. They handed me a bunch of beers and we parted ways.
More drinks, more dancing (to awkward dubstub music), and more mingling. I spot a duo of girls sitting in the couch a few feet away. Every time I looked over, they would as well. I didn't think much of it, until they both came up to me and began flirting. One of them asked where I was from (she happens to live in a neighboring town), what I was celebrating, and other boring "let's-chat-but-what-I-really-wanna-know-is-if-you're-going-to-bang-me" questions. A few minutes of chatting later, she pulls out her phone; usually, it's a can of pepper spray. In my head, I was thinking "Yes, here's my chance. The door's wide open for you, Chris!"
Yes! Drunk text me! Text me like one of your French girls!
Instead, I feel a tap on my shoulder. It was one of my friends who showed up late to the party. We exchanged words, talked about a few things; each of my sentences getting shorter. My friend didn't get the hint. He kept talking. I could slowly see the girls next to me losing interest and looking at their phones. "Fack!" Before I could end the conversation with my friend, the girls quickly said goodbye and left to get more drinks.
He inadvertently cockblocked me.
I was ready to strangle my friend with my hands and eagle talon feet. But he didn't know, I can't hate him for it. However, his invite to my next birthday event will "mysteriously" get lost in the mail somehow.
True
