November 4, 2010

  • Sure fire ways to triple your eProp count.

    http://x8c.xanga.com/f5a8310a66240272985555/w163614127.jpg

    I've had it with you Xangans. You pester me with all the same questions. Now, I'm here to lay it down for all you eProp hoarding hooligans. In the most childish voice: "How do you get so many eProps?", "Can you give me some props?", "What are some tips for getting props?", "What exactly DID she say?" ENOUGH! Here, take this quick crash course on eProp massing and be gone!

    Say it's your birthday. Everybody loves a birthday. Even if it's out of pity, the people who come by your site will automatically prop you--just for your birthday. Have no shame in having three birthdays in a year--nobody will notice.

    Threaten a Xanga shutdown. We've all seen this before. "Goodbye Xanga, it's been nice. I want to thank yadda, yadda...etc" Then the rush of comments come in, pleading for him/her to stay (though most don't care). It's normal human behavior to feel pity for a loss. Hey, you might even score a throng of eProps from the Emo community. The next thing you know, "hey, what a surprise!" They return one week later.

    Post something racy. Rile up the crowds. Do some damage. Be politically incorrect--you'll get some attention. Having difficulty choosing a group? No sweat, here are the top 5 classifications on Xanga in order of volume:

    1) Asians
    2) Thinsporational sites
    3) Teens (11-18)
    4) Camerawhores
    5) Music/Layout sites

    Feign going "protected posting" when in reality, you never had the intention. "Like, omg, I must know exactly what he/she's doing 24/7." "I wonder what's going to be written in protected!" You youngin's are so curious--but you'll get the props--you'll get 'em.

    Random prop like no tomorrow. If all else fails, this is your last resort. Proceed with caution, for the recipient of the "Random Prop" may backlash with tremendous zeal. And if you happen to leave me one of these flaming piles of turds, I'll simply purple-nurple you so hard, you'll have to tattoo your nipples back on.

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